I have been on a quest for the Ark of the Covenant, the Sankara Stones, the Holy Grail AND a decent toilet paper. Needless to say, I found the first three watching Indiana Jones movies. But, until recently the latter has eluded me. Today I tell you the quest is over. My prize may not be on the shelf of any museum but it has earned a place of honor in my throne room.
So most of you might just pick up any old toilet paper at the store and not spend much time on your decision. I however spend too much time on any decision as I have to research everything. I have even considered using “family paper” for a brief moment (I won’t explain – Google if you dare!)
Here’s my list of what I look for in a toilet paper and why I had such trouble finding it:
- A toilet paper that is not wrapped in any sort of plastic – If I may remind you, PLASTIC LASTS FOREVER, so I have been desperately trying to not buy any more. The only one that my local stores sell that is not covered in plastic is a big brand that I can only refer to as Voldemort (We shall not speak its name because of all the hineys it has murdered!).
- A toilet paper that is not bleached – Literally, chemical warfare on your most sensitive parts.
- A toilet paper that is strong enough to keep my fingers and my bum away from each other because, ewww!
- A toilet paper that is not sandpaper to our sensitive parts – Back to He who must not be named, but there are also others out there masquerading as gentle and soft that should be added to this category. I have learned the hard way that a baby or an animal or even a baby animal does not mean it will be soft – Why did I think that anyway? I’m pretty sure that babies and animals don’t even use toilet paper…
- A toilet paper company that I could feel good about supporting – My golden goose – that at last has been found.
Who Gives A Crap is a toilet paper company. I love their snarky name. The toilet paper comes delivered to your door in a giant box. The rolls are all individually wrapped in PAPER (and the paper is pretty cute – they just released a Christmas wrapper that is making me think about buying more before I even start to run out). I purchased the Premium brand which is made out bamboo (and super sustainable). The toilet paper is strong and gentle and somehow lasts longer that the typical rolls we have been using.
The best part is that 50% of their profits go towards building toilets for the 2.3 BILLION people that don’t have them. That’s right 40% of the world DON’T have toilets! The price seemed a little high to me at first but when I considered the tithing aspect and that the rolls last forever (okay not really, but more than a day at our house is a HUGE deal), I have decided that this is now (insert Indiana Jones theme music here – dun dun dunt dun, dun dunt dunnn) our TOILET PAPER!
p.s. The last three rolls are labeled “Emergency Rolls” so you remember to buy more! Cute and functional!
Buying toilet paper the AMAZINGLY SIMPLE way.